No, I agree that the smut would be...I don't want to say boring ;), but it certainly wouldn't have the same emotional impact without the story.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that while reading this is that if felt jumbled and incomplete - maybe it's just a matter of the lack of connect-y bits? Or maybe I just needed those connect-y bits to mark places, ie, this happens and then we are here in this place in the tale because of x - nothing major, just a throwaway sentence or phrase. To me it's as if the story was written, printed out, the paragraphs cut up and mixed together again, but some meaningful sentences were lost when the useless bits were tossed aside.
Does that make more sense?
And I don't want to suggest that the writing is poor - my apologies if that's how my comments have come across! Because, honestly, OMaN's 'poor' efforts are miles ahead.
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I guess what I'm trying to say is that while reading this is that if felt jumbled and incomplete - maybe it's just a matter of the lack of connect-y bits? Or maybe I just needed those connect-y bits to mark places, ie, this happens and then we are here in this place in the tale because of x - nothing major, just a throwaway sentence or phrase. To me it's as if the story was written, printed out, the paragraphs cut up and mixed together again, but some meaningful sentences were lost when the useless bits were tossed aside.
Does that make more sense?
And I don't want to suggest that the writing is poor - my apologies if that's how my comments have come across! Because, honestly, OMaN's 'poor' efforts are miles ahead.