Not sure if I read the beginning 'right', but the sudden PoV shift pulled me out of the narrative a bit. I don't mind points of view alternating between sections, but it feels weird to me when it happens between one sentence and the next.
I liked the concept of the story, the implied horror of what's coming in 'Irresistible', something that we know and she doesn't. Reading it made me uncomfortable, and that's the way it should be - she isn't in a 'comfortable' place by any means.
![[community profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/community.png){kind=small}
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
winterfish
no subject
Date: 2014-05-22 07:39 am (UTC)I liked the concept of the story, the implied horror of what's coming in 'Irresistible', something that we know and she doesn't. Reading it made me uncomfortable, and that's the way it should be - she isn't in a 'comfortable' place by any means.