Story 98: "Untitled Random Case File #4664" by Jess Mabe

[wendelah1]

Continuing my unofficial boycott of all things serious, I bring you something different, courtesy of a timely nomination by infinitlight. This metafic by Jess Mabe is clever, funny, and offers some interesting observations about writing fan fiction. She rates the fic "R" for Raunchy "but no actual sex was harmed in the making of this story." Damn, even her liner notes make me laugh.

Although the author has left the fandom, and has no working email address, at least none that I am aware of, we would love to know what you think of her story. Please leave us suggestions for next time, too. Humor is especially appreciated by the management at this time.


Untitled Random Case File #4664

Comments

Just my imagination, part two

[wendelah1]

She also examines the complicated relationship between the fan fiction writer and her characters, who aren't really hers, at least not hers alone. This passage in particular had me squirming, and not in the good way.

"It's like this... see, I like fanfiction, I really do. In it I get to be
stronger, tougher, sexier than I do on the show. I speak my feelings and
show my heart. I get laid occasionally." She laughed and squeezed my knee.
"But Mulder... well, fanfiction writers seem to love torturing him. The
injuries he has to endure, and the lengthy, draw-out recoveries... and then
there's the fact that he's often portrayed as a bumbling idiot, dropping his
gun all the time."

I found myself reviewing my own stories, trying to see if I had tortured Mulder, or subjected him to unnecessary medical procedures. So far, my conscience is clear, though I did kill off William in one story, off-stage, but still. Anyway, I haven't done anything worse to the characters than what has already been to them in canon.

"I didn't really mean it," he said sadly. "I was just mad that she was
trying to break up. I had just told her I loved her..." He broke off for a
moment and I could see them both lean forward expectantly.

He looked up, right into Mulder's eyes, and delivered the line exactly as
I'd instructed.

"I mean," Billy said. "You tell the woman you love her and she just blows
you off. How would you feel?"

Mulder's face turned a peculiar shade of gray. He glanced nervously at
Scully, who was studiously avoiding his gaze, then turned to look at me. I
have to admit, the look hurt.

There's a reason he makes the big bucks.

"I'd imagine that was difficult for you," he said at last, voice dripping
venom. "But that doesn't mean you can threaten someone, that you can
therefore go on to hurt them."

Scully was staring at me now, and I was beginning to feel the early twinges of author guilt. I reminded myself that this sort of torture was sanctioned by the Big Guy. He did it to them all the time, right? She looked away and I stopped blushing.

"But I didn't do anything to Diane," Billy said earnestly. If he'd noticed
the effect his remark had on them, he didn't show it. God, why couldn't they
all be this good? "I was just mad, I swear."

"I understand," Scully said at last, moving forward, "that your mother,
father and sister have all died of various cancers?"

"That's right," Billy said, his voice sad and a bit whispery. "All within a
few months of each other. Sometimes this world is so f****d up, you know,
man?"

Mulder sighed and drew one hand through his hair. "Yeah," he said, "yeah, I
do."

Scully looked at him quickly, then looked away. "Billy, how would you have
characterized your relationship with your family?"

"Well, sometimes we'd fight and everything, but we got along ok, I guess."

She nodded and wrote it all down.

"Let us know if you think of anything you think might be helpful," Mulder
said, handing Billy his card. "Anything at all."

We'd been in the car for nearly half an hour before I realized they weren't
speaking to me. Sometimes characters can be so childish, you know?

"I was just going for a good audience reaction," I stressed as we walked up
toward their suite.

Mulder gave me a look that said I could kiss my own ass. I left Scully
examining Billy's family's file, and Mulder sipping an Evian with a
disgusted look on his face.

Characters always have minds of their own but fan fiction characters are the worst.