Story 169: "In My Secret Life" by David Hearne

[amyhit.livejournal.com]

I was originally considering something fluffy after last week's horror and gloom, but then this fic lured me in with its spare, eerie tone and the unique way it makes use of several important loose threads the series left us with.

So this week's rec is the story of how young William Van de Kamp uncovers the truth about who he is, and what's happening to the world. It's set between the years 2005 and 2012, and it deftly weaves a lot of impact into only 8K of writing.


In My Secret Life by David Hearne

And for those of you who find this sort of info interesting: the posting date on this fic is stamped May 20, 2002 - the day after the series finale aired. When Hearne gets a story in his head he clearly doesn't hesitate.

Craving something longer, smuttier, happier? Have a specific fic you'd like to discuss? The comments thread is always open.

Comments

[estella-c.livejournal.com]

Excellent choice! (Probably.) I love David Hearne. I used to post on his journal when he ran a bookstore, and then he disappeared. Anyone know anything about him now?

One of the (three, four, five?) good guys.

[amyhit.livejournal.com]

One of the (three, four, five?) good guys.

Hey, I never even thought of it before you mentioned this, but in light of our recent discussion about Khyber's opus, it does seem kind of appropriate to at least post something by a guy just now. Not that one guy's fanfic replaces another guy's fanfic - not like all guy's fanfic is the same, or...um.

"Hooray for guys writing fanfic! More of that, please," is what I'm saying.

As to Hearne: Man, was he ever prolific. He was a vignette writing whiz.

1/2 - style, concept, and character voice

[amyhit.livejournal.com]

Writing style seems as good a place to start as any, I guess. The style of the writing in IMSL it much plainer than the vignettes I usually favor. There are places I feel the exact phrasing of a sentence is a bland or stilted, especially at the start of the fic, before the plot begins to thicken. However, by the time I get to the last word, I'm left feeling the fic's style works with the underlying dynamics of the story. The writing is nearly denotative, observing and describing what is, rather than evoking any specific feelings about what is happening, and I think that reinforces William's character, both as a child who has not yet developed complex inner systems of understanding, and as someone who must choose what role he will play in coming events. The power of the fic comes from the possibility that he might choose wrong, and the unaffected tone of the writing reinforces my belief in that possibility.

The idea of William's place in the world to come is developed in a few spare lines throughout the fic, and is the key issue of importance in the story, but Hearne only really brings the issue into focus in the last several sentences of the fic: William, leaving home, comes to a fork in the road and divines the direction he's going to go based on the love his birth parents feel for him, and whether their love is a convincing testament to the rightness of their cause. IMSL is something of a parable, a morality tale - the (potential) savior child with ghosts on his shoulder, guiding him. But it's an unfinished morality tale, which I think is what gives it its power and subtlety. It's not about right triumphing over wrong. It's about coming of age - choosing one's values, whatever they may be.

I also think the voices of the ghosts are very well written. Even without the clues Hearne weaves in to tell us who each ghost is, I think most of the time I could probably guess who each ghost was by their speech alone. He really nails the tone of each character.

2/2 - okay wait, what?

[amyhit.livejournal.com]

The one thing that has me confused about this fic is the part where CSM tells William:

"You also have two fathers and two mothers. One bloodline is made from power and secrets. The other..."

The ghost struggled to find a word which pleased him. Then he shrugged and said, "The other side is based on love -- a very overrated concept, if you ask me."

"I didn't."

The ghost stopped smiling. "Be smart, boy. Choose the winning side. Otherwise...you're just another dead human."

What I can't figure out is, what is CSM trying to convince William of here? Originally I thought he was trying to convince William to join the colonists rather than the resistance. After all, that's the side I'm used to CSM being on. Yet Mulder and Scully must be the "bloodline made from power and secrets" he's speaking of, right? For one thing, the Van de Kamps are not William's bloodline at all. Yet an important part of the fic is that Mulder and Scully are out there somewhere, and that they love William, so it doesn't make sense for CSM to tell William the Van de Kamps side is the one based on love, because clearly they both are.

It seems like CSM is telling William the colonists are the winning side. Didn't he always place his bets that way? But he could also be telling William not to just sit around the farm with his loving mom and pop while there's a battle out there that won't be ignored. I find this all unclear and contradictory. To be honest, I'm a little aggravated by the idea that I was probably wrong about CSM's motives. I so much prefer the idea that CSM is arguing for the colonist's side. It strengthens the parable-like nature of the fic. I find it a lot more compelling and complex to think that William has ghosts on both his shoulders, trying to sway him both ways, and not just towards the "good" side.

I always thought when he came to the forked road at the end, one road was the road he could take to join with the colonists, and the other was the road to his parents and to resistance - maybe not literally, but metaphorically speaking. But now I'm wondering if I had the duality wrong. Perhaps the choice he had to make was whether to fight or stay home, and he ultimately made it in the second to last scene, when he awakened his special abilities, meaning he planned to fight. But then why does that scene end with the line: For a brief moment, he saw himself doubled in the reflection.? Doesn't that mean that there is still a choice he must make - a choice that is dividing him?

And for that matter, what is the point of the forked road if each fork isn't symbolic of a different outcome? Is it merely that one road will take him to his parents and the other won't? I don't like that, it doesn't have anywhere near the narrative power that the colonists/resistance duality has.

Argh. This was a much more simple comment when I began it. I've just nitpicked the narrative linchpin I thought this fic had into nothing, and now I have no idea what I think. *throws up hands*

[estella-c.livejournal.com]

amyhit, I meant to comment earlier. It's a shame everyone seems to be elsewhere. I blame the weather. Or possibly the House of Representatives.

This is indeed a powerful story. Much of the power comes from its spare, denotative (as you call it) style. I liked it better than that other William ghost story, which seemed a bit dulled by vague symbolism.

I think the confusing--and perhaps mistaken--line is "You also have two fathers and two mothers." One is forced to think of M & S versus the Van de Kamps. But really the puzzle unravels when we think of Mulder and Scully representing the two bloodlines, which is factually the case. Mulder's past is full of power and secrets; his whole life is devoted to finding their source. Scully is the product of marital and sibling love, plus religion. This actually makes Mulder the focus of love and power, and the speech would make a *little* more sense if he were the one hearing it.

I blame the writer. He was working too quickly. I hope he reappears to argue with me.

Nevertheless, I am a fan of IMSL, and it's verbal clarity and brevity set a good example for many fic writers.

[amyhit.livejournal.com]

I liked it better than that other William ghost story, which seemed a bit dulled by vague symbolism.

Ah, right, Silver Bells and Cockle Shells. I really like SB&CS, but I find it ultimately insubstantial. There's a lot of intriguing ideas in it, but none of those ideas really attach to anything in the bigger picture. It was very intriguing for such a tiny fic, but I felt like contemplation was the whole point. Whereas IMSL has its root closely and directly in the broader XF story, which is something I find extremely valuable, considering how few fic really develop William's character in a way that's to my liking. To me IMSL feels so possible, and very connected to the XF universe. I've always loved the idea of William reconvening with Mulder and Scully at some point, to fight in the resistance, and I think I've always hung onto that possibility as my own personal canon, even though I've also always figured CC would never actually write it that way. IMSL makes me realize exactly how much I want this for the characters and for the story.

I think the confusing--and perhaps mistaken--line is "You also have two fathers and two mothers." One is forced to think of M & S versus the Van de Kamps. But really the puzzle unravels when we think of Mulder and Scully representing the two bloodlines

I think you're right about this. At first when I thought CSM was advocating for the colonists, I did presume the two bloodlines he was speaking of were Mulder's and Scully's. But then the "two mothers and two fathers" line confused me, as you said. the trouble with thinking critically about things is that a slight flaw can derail everything. I should have stuck by my initial impression, and am only too happy to get back to it, despite the small snag.

[wendelah1]

I like this story a lot. It reminds me just a bit of, yes, "Silver Bells and Cockle Shells," because of the ghosts, I suppose, but also of a longer story which was recced here a little over three years ago but never discussed, probably because people were too preoccupied with the second movie. I should have put this place on hiatus for the entire month of August in 2008. From the looks of the comments, or should I say lack of them, maybe we should go on hiatus again until September this year? Well, let's see if "Certitude" brings anyone out to play.

Yeah, the story that it reminds me of a bit is Susanne Starz's "The Great Baseball Prodigy of Caribou Cove." Both stories are about William, and his place in the mythology. I rarely like or read stories about William because I hate, and I do mean hate the canon concerning him, starting with the IVF and ending with his being given up for adoption. I prefer to ignore eighth and ninth seasons as a result, and I suspect a little of my animosity toward the second film has to do with its non-handling of the William issue.

But this story handles his storyline very well. Too bad they didn't hire Hearne to write the second film.